On Monday, Vanessa Simmons revealed that she is pregnant, by posting her sonogram photo to Instragram with the caption, “a little princess on the way.” When I heard the news I thought, “Oh, good for her” for a split second, and then I continued doing whatever it was that I was busy with at the time. But what makes us all so very unique as human beings is how we process information, and the fact that so many fornicators came out of the woodwork, judging Vanessa Simmons’ pregnancy, was unbelievable to me.
Most of the comments ranged from “How is she so proud to be a baby mother?” all the way to “See, this is the problem with Black women these days, spreading their legs for men who won’t put a ring on it!” And as I really took in some of the ignorant bullshit comments that people were directing at Simmons, I simply couldn’t understand how “congratulations” weren’t these peoples’ first thought. There’s nothing more hypocritical than a fornicator judging her for what essentially is the result of the same act the fornicator willingly and happily participates in.
If you’ve been judging Simmons and you are unmarried, devoted to your religion, and a virgin, then please feel free to stop reading now (well, actually you probably should read John 8:7 in your Bible – you know that passage that says “Let him who is without sin among you be the first to throw a stone at her.”) But, if you are getting it in with your man or woman and you aren’t married, yet love quoting the very same Bible you rebel against in your day-to-day life, then please SHUT THE HELL UP!
If you fancy yourself a pseudo African-American social scientist who LOVES waxing philosophic about how baby-mama’s are the DOWNFALL of our community and continually quote a bunch of misleading percentages with no sociological context, yet you actively engage in premarital sex, I’m gonna need you to shut your self-righteous, overly-indignant ass up.
The one thing MANY of the people demonizing Vanessa have in common with her, is they are unmarried and getting it in. Regardless of your religion, social beliefs, or whoever you want people online and offline to THINK you are, many people are smashing someone else with NO RINGS on ANY fingers, and no matter how safe you try and make your sex, there is ALWAYS a chance you can get pregnant.
If you are REALLY concerned with the welfare of Vanessa and her child, stop acting like a DOUCHEBAG by judging an act that has already happened, and just focus on making things better. Keep your self-righteous BULLSHIT to yourself, and only open your damn mouth when you have an idea that’s productive and can better people’s lives. pharisaically standing on sanctimony is NOT cute and definitely NOT the actions of a Godly or wise person.
P.s. Ladies & Gentlemen, you can feel FREE to stop attacking Vanessa alone as if she impregnated herself. The father of her daughter is Michael Wayans, and he played an EQUAL role in the creation of this child.
Lincoln Anthony Blades blogs daily on his site ThisIsYourConscience.com, he’s an author of the book “You’re Not A Victim, You’re A Volunteer” and a weekly contributor for UPTOWN Magazine. He can be reached via Twitter @lincolnablades and on Facebook at This Is Your Conscience.